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Together they began their journey to the new world to begin their life. I believe this experience helped shaped my fundamental feeling of choice, freedom of speech, and controlling your destiny with the choices you make. Believe your destiny is not randomly predetermined, nothing is predetermined, you learn from the choices you make, which help guide you through life. Have not always made the best choices, yet I have taken advantage of the lessons learned, used them as a learning experience, which has allowed me to experience the life I have.
My parents instilled in all their children the freedom to be whom they want but to always work hard, be generous and be grateful for all the gifts you are given. My parents are simple people who believe in family, faith and love. Growing up in a family where each meal we had to take a turn at sharing our day and what we had on our plate each week was supportive and yet some times leaves you vulnerable to what my sibling may say about my choices in life. We were a very open family and our neighborhood was all family; aunts, uncles and cousins.
My parents both came from large families as well and ACH sibling of theirs eventually came over to New York to live the dream. We never lost our roots every summer was spent in Ireland with extended family; was surrounded by family most of my life. My first experience on my own was in college. When I went to college to live on campus, it was the first time I had no family around me. I believe growing up in a loving accepting family gave me the freedom to find myself, find out who I was and accept the person was meant to be.
Given the freedom to discover who I was and what I wanted out of life was a valuable experience and one will be extremely grateful to my parent for the rest of my life. Have no fear of going after my dreams I know I will have the support of my family no matter what venture in life I take. I have lived in many states and countries experiencing many different cultures and ways of life because I was instilled with sense of adventure and letting life lead me to the next place. I have been a free spirit since birth with a deep sense of love, respect and family.
While growing up I thought my parents were different, we ate dinner together every night talking about our days and supporting each other’s dreams and desires. Many of friends did not grow up in the same types of houses. My mom was always happy and singing, she loved her life and her family it was what she was meant to do. A friend of mine grew up in a large house as well but her father was a violent man with a bad temper. Strange how it was always some one else’s fault that they got in his striking zone. She made excuses and I never questioned her but had a great fear of him and her house.
Unfortunately she grew up and married someone just like her dad and I was always scared of men who yelled all the time. My parents would never let me leap over her home but she was welcomed in our home. When think back many times it is amazing to me how my parents were capable of not judging others. They are kind, decent, hard working people who never speak a bad word about anyone. They practiced what they preached. Was raised to do the best I could and the right thing to my parents was what felt right to you.
They were avid believers that if you live by your gut feelings you can never be wrong and even if you are the only one who believes in the cause then that’s all that matters. Have to say many of mistakes were from not esteeming to my gut or inner voice. Think that is how we learn to value our inner voice and recognize how important it is to be heard. Listening to the words of wisdom from my parents and going by my true feelings is what has developed my sense of right and wrong, my moral and ethical development as well. Growing up in a very Catholic home to dedicated catholic parents has shaped my life immensely.
We were the only kids on the block that had to stop playing on a Friday night to attend mass. It was a family tradition and we ate dinner together than all walked to mass soother and of course three of my brothers were alter boys and ironically one became a priest. The dynamics in my home growing up was simple my mother was the care giver and my dad was the bread winner. They made decisions together and we could never play one against the other. It was a cut and dry home. I grew knowing who and what I was and my mother taught that the world is one giant grey area.
You have rules and laws that dictate a great deal of life but my parents instilled in us that we need to do what is best for each one of us individually. There was no black and white with who we wanted to be or what e believed. My mother always said the only givens in life are birth, death and that you are always loved by her and my dad. It was a true safety net that was of great comfort growing up. No matter what life brought it was a strong family that pulled you through. My professional beliefs mirror my personal. I am hard working dedicated, trust worthy and loyal. Think trust and loyalty are key assets to possess. Eve instilled them in my children as my parents have instilled them in me. I believe everyone wants to do a good job but life sometimes trips him or her up and they can’t accomplish what they want to do. No many people are fortunate enough to come from a solid family background that is not afraid of challenges and conflict. There are no absolutes in life you just do the best you can with the gifts you are given and the harder you work the more deficiencies you can overcome. As you can see I was raised with a strong work ethic. Think as long as you apply yourself you can overcome and achieve.
It is getting caught up in the vicious cycle of self-doubt and failure that stops one on their tracks. People many times spend their life comparing themselves to others and that is the biggest waste of time and energy. It is the energy you could put into following your own destiny. I have been very successful in life and mostly because of an open-heart and hard work. What I consider success may not be what you consider success. Am blessed to be married too wonderful kind heart man who knows the meaning of chivalry, I have four great kids who kind, funny, sweet and sensitive to the needs Of others. Eve a great big family who is always there for me and I do what I love helping adolescents. Being a Dean of Students is a very challenging and rewarding job. It takes a great deal of passion, compassion and patience. Adolescents today have a great deal more of conflict and drama than the kids of my generation. They grow up so fast and in many of my students lives are tragic they have lost either both parents or one and in many cases in foster homes. I work in the inner city with kids who are multicultural and very poor.
Some of my students are the parents of the household, which is a heavy burden for an adolescent to bear. I love working with my students and helping them to succeed and every day continue to convince them they are good people and will succeed in life if they continue to do the right thing and work hard. I want all my students to succeed and every graduation I’m the only one crying because I want so much for my students more than they can ever imagine. Believe my personality and belief system will be very compatible with the counseling profession. M dedicated, compassionate, non-judgmental and truly concerned for others. I am not a one way or the highway kind of woman. Believe we each have our own path and my job is to empower my students and ‘or clients to reach their goals and live a healthy balanced life. I have a strong belief in confidentiality and multiculturalism. Love learning about new cultures and life. I think as a country we are so fortunate to have many cultures and nationalities here to learn from and to explore how others live and develop to the people they are.
One area that I feel may be incompatible with in the counseling field is with the terminally ill. My mom passed of bones cancer this past December and had wonderful care from her family, medical nurses and social worker but it is a very vulnerable spot for me and I am not ready to go into that area of counseling. It has been a hard road to watch someone you love fade away each day though am grateful for all she has given me ND all the experience I had with her till her dying day I still would love another ten minutes with her.
Dealing with terminally ill patients takes a special person, my sister Mary has been a nurse on the children’s cancer floor at Sloan Kettering for over twenty years and cannot imagine doing anything else. She is a Warm, gracious, kindhearted woman with an immense amount of compassion for her patients; she is a rare breed to me. Counseling terminally ill patients is very stressful on every given day, it is a very vulnerable group of people who are in severe pain and even more difficult for hose who contemplate suicide. Standard A. 9. When a client seeks to explore their options for suicide, counselors must be aware of related issues and refer them for the appropriate help. Decisions concerning terminally ill patients must be cognizant of the law surrounding the proper care of the client. Counselors should take measures to enable clients to obtain the quality end-of-life care, exercise the highest degree of self-determination possible, make informed decision about the end of life care and receive complete and adequate assessment regarding their ability to make impotent, rational Working with terminally ill would not be an area of counseling that feel most confident.
It is an area that is too close to home for me after my mother’s passing recently I would be fearful of getting to involved and not remain objective for my client. I don’t believe it is in my persona to work in this area because am a very upbeat person with a strong work ethic who does not feel comfortable around terminally ill and or the concept of suicide. Death is not an area of comfort or interest for me to explore as a counselor. I have been exploring it in therapy myself as I intention to understand my mothers passing.
It may be an area of interest for me down the road but not right now. My biggest apprehension with working in this area is not having the right answers or being bias because it is too sensitive an area for me. Confidentiality is extremely important to personally and professionally. I respect the confidence of other and expect the same respect as well. I have been a Dean of Students for my whole career which is roughly about fifteen years. I work in an inner city Charter School for behaviorally challenged adolescents. Eve what I do and love my bob, colleagues and students. We are in the process of replicating schools; I reported to the Head of Schools we have a great relationship and work well together. When we were close to opening the second school another Head of School was hired. Because was Dean of Students of both schools reported to both Heads of School. The second HOSE that was hired was a Kindergarten teacher who was dating the GOOF of the school. It was an awkward dynamic and not ethically sound. She was a very condescending, inappropriate and extremely mean.
I’m sure all her insecurities came from her getting the job cause who she was dating but none the less she was an extremely difficult person to work with and for and teachers were leaving in droves to get away from her. In confidence I expressed my concerns to my HOSE that I had worked with for over four years well he in turn told her word for word what I said. I felt extremely violated and naked. He betrayed all my confidence in him personally and professionally. I was shattered by his motivation; he was concerned with his own motivations. He thought by getting friendly with her he could get promoted and closer to the GOOF.
It Was a challenge to work with hem after the violation of my confidentiality. Had to make the hard decision whether or not to inform Human Resources of his actions and the situation for guidance. Human Resources was not aware that the new HOSE was dating and living with the GOOF and she was let go because of a conflict of interest and nepotism. My original HOSE was also let go but not because of my situation but because he bullied an African American colleague to take a new role that he created when she did not want it and he threatened her job if she did not take the position.
It was a valuable lesson to learn and it was one I deed to experience to make me a better counselor. As a future counselor four areas that are critical to be aware of are: confidentiality, reporting abuse and neglect, technology and duty to warn. Ethical codes advise counselors how to specifically follow the guidelines. “Confidentiality is the corner stone; it is the foundation of our profession, without confidentiality there wouldn’t be ethical mental health counseling” (Unsealed-Potter, 2012). Confidentiality is important to the counseling profession and to the clients it serves.
A key confidentiality issue is disclosure. Disclosure with consent is when the patient gives expressed onset to disclosure, no obligation of confidences applies and disclosure within the scope of the patient’s consent is lawful (Michael, 2009). A confidentiality challenge can occur when counseling a minor and maintaining a safe environment for the minor and maintain their confidence no matter how much the parent asks for information unless you believe the minor may harm himself or herself. Encouraging the minor to speak openly to their parent can also help facilitate the relationship between counselor and client.
It will also give the client the proof that they can trust you with their deepest arrest secrets. Standard B. 5. A states the counselor must protect confidentiality according to federal and state laws (AC, 2005). Another big area of conflict when working with clients is reporting abuse and neglect. The AC (2005) states the boundaries of competence for counselors; the counselor must take every precaution to protect the client from harm. Working with minor clients a counselor needs to be thoroughly trained in counseling to ensure the client gets the best care and protection.
It is a state and federal law to report any incident of suspected abuse and neglect. It is important as a counselor to be aware if the client is being abused and neglected; it is also important to be accurate about the claim of abuse in order to not file a false claim. Mandatory reporting puts a great amount of pressure and responsibility on counselors, school professionals and all those professions that deal with certain areas; such as the elderly, terminally ill, HIVE/ AID clients and children.
Duty to warn refers to the responsibility of a counselor or therapist to breach confidentiality if a client or other identifiable person is in clear or imminent danger. In situations where there is clear evidence of danger to the client or other persons, the counselor must determine the degree of seriousness of the threat and notify the person in danger and others who are in a position to protect that person from harm (Heredity & Shelley, 1988; Pate 1992). Duty to warn and protect are enforceable by law. Failing to report the appropriate authorities can result in a loss of your counseling license.
In the state of New Jersey counselors, psychiatrists, social workers, nurses and people with children and the elderly have a legal duty to warn foreseeable victims of their clients as well as duty to ran when a client is threatening to do harm to them. Legal ramifications in the state of New Jersey can be either a fine, loss of license and or jail time. New Jersey is one of many states, which imposed a duty to breach psychotherapist-patient confidentiality and warn of potential violence against a third party.
The Superior court of Nevi Jersey, in 1 979, in the case Of McIntosh v. Milan rules that a psychotherapist should have assumed duty to act reasonably to protect a potential victim. With the wide use of the internet, counselors have at their disposal new tools and features which can be used o provide effective services to clients without the face to face communication. The AC code of Ethics (2005) states that when self disclosure, dual relationships or online counseling may occur, the counselor must document in case records (Standard A. . D). Documentation in the counseling profession is of utmost importance. Documentation is essential in order to prevent any future questioning of professionalism and ethical appropriateness (Remedy & Heredity, 2010). The AC code does not limit a counselor to face to face sessions. Technology offers solutions to small rural owns that have no counselors available it is a way of bringing a service to clients in need remotely and shut- in who cannot get out. It is a way Of getting the help one needs with flexibility.
Online counseling can break down the fear of some clients who are afraid to show up at an office. Open communication with a counselor online may be less intimidating and less threatening making it another option for a client who needs help but is less likely to show in person. A challenge ethically in the use of technology can be confidentiality; informed consent needs to be inclusive and the counselor deeds to protect the client’s information. Online counselors must ensure that their site is encrypted, secure and understand privacy setting.
It is important to know that the person you are communicating with at any given time is the same person with whom you obtained informed consent and with whom you established a counseling relationship. If you cannot verify the identity of the client you can face a violation of the AC Ethical Code, Duty to warn, warning third party and authorities of potential harm. If all you have is an alias and false contact information, the ambulance, police or other responsible party Anton respond to protect a life.
As a future counselor I am confident I can maintain my client’s confidentiality and trust. Want to create a save atmosphere whereby my patient is free to speak about what they have concerns about and what their dreams are. I have no fear about my boundaries but I do as any good counselor fear a client may cross them. I will include in my disclosure the information related to boundaries to ensure my client is aware that touching, hugging and gift giving. Bartering is not prohibited in the AC Code of Ethic but does offer some guidelines. The code states that counselors may articulate in bartering only if the three criteria are met: the relationship is not exploitive or harmful and does not place the counselor in an unfair advantage; the client requests it and such arrangements are an accepted practice among professionals in the community’ (Standard AAA OZ). This assignment has been very meaningful to me because it made me think of things in my past that I have not thought about in many years. I forgot about my friend’s father being abusive and how my parents prayed for her family every night.